1. |
Shot Knocking
03:44
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But I’ve always said
I am at the mercy of it
I have no answers
Even your kind words seem
Now to come in-between
Lengthy absence
When you leave a pause
Sighing more deaths of course
Because you see it all
(You) make me feel young again
(You) make me feel dumb again
Easily hurt
But I’ve always said
I am at the mercy of it
Now even your kind words seem
Somehow forced in-between
I am your faithful dog
In constant need of
Reassurance
Self-esteem is shot
And the knocking on
The door is endless
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2. |
Homeward Bound
03:31
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I have been buried
For many months now
Breathing’s been heavy
Air underground
Is stale but precious
A spirited cloud
Resting my head ‘cause
I’m homeward bound
Homeward bound
I have been checking
Over my skin
For signs of infection
Discolouring
We’re used to being lied to
(We) pretend not to hear
Most times when I need you
You disappear
Disappear
I have been resting
In waiting room chairs
Answering questions
(In) professional care
Just think that it’s best when
You’re rehearsing goodbyes
You take your own medicine
And close your eyes
Close your eyes
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3. |
Tried Nothing
03:53
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Oh what a great CEO you might’ve made
Sighing on the phone in pubs, cafes
To yes and yes and yes
And all your loyal sweethearts scrunching up their face
Tell you that you’re just like them
And it’s best, they guess
And yes and yes
=2(Yes)
=2(Now look at you)
=2(What did you lose?)
Nothing at all
=2(Scared all the time)
=2(But what have you tried?)
Nothing at all
=3(All)
You should hear the way you sound when you talk
Of dinner parties, afternoons
And of heart-to-hearts and hillside walks
And all the things you’ve still not found the time to do
Oh how this has been hard for you
Oh what a hardship to
Keep bending truths
Truth
=2(Now look at you)
=2(What did you lose?)
Nothing at all
=2(Scared all the time)
=2(But what have you tried?)
Nothing at all
=2(Now look at you)
What did you lose?
Nothing at all
=2(Scared all the time)
But what have you tried?
Nothing at all
=2(Nothing at all)
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4. |
Red Eye
03:44
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Settle in, take your time
Hang it all out on the line
For the rest of your life
This will be etched into your mind
From this moment onwards
Life will never be the same
My ideas of happiness
And hope will have to change
Settle in, take your time
Take deep breaths
And clear your eyes
For the rest of our lives
We can but analyse
=2(Throwing away
All of this, all of it
Was it worth it?)
By the end, eyes are red
And you’re shivering like death
There’s this vast emptiness
(The) ground is waves
And I’m a mess
We walk back home
And stick the television on
And one last time pretend
Like nothing has gone wrong
=4(Throwing away
All of this, all of it
Was it worth it?)
Throwing away
All of this, all of it
For a doubt
Throwing away
All of this, all of it
Was it worth it?
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5. |
Escape Plan
03:34
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All these new free hours
And cards and arms of flowers
I guess that your
Conscience must be raging
You’re overcompensating
It’s pitiful
Fear made you call off
The escape plan
When you realised guards might die
Overnight a conscience arose
And now you’re constantly asking for
Something you can do to be
Making yourself useful
It’s comical
Fear made you call off
The escape plan
When you realised guards might die
When I became a patient
You stared out into space
You were nowhere
The next day you were suddenly
Summoning time
From out of clean air
Guilt made you call off
The escape plan
When you realised guards might die
A photo-op donation
A public declaration
We see through it
But we’re buried in this debt
So we’ll take what we can get
And be glad of it
Guilt made you call off
The escape plan
When you realised guards have lives
The escape plan
And their families won’t survive
The escape plan
The escape plan
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6. |
Battery Lights
03:18
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Each step could be my last one
And so I probe them
With deep suspicion
The ground is moss on rocks underwater
Progress is slow
And comes fraught with danger
If I should mis-step or lose my footing
I could be carried rapidly downstream
And (even) if I get safe
I’ll be in bad shape
And then the ambulances will come
Then by my bedside, you’ll be there
Dwelling upon the pressure
That you’re under
=2(Your flailing arms
Took down a power line
So now we live
With nasty battery lights)
Self-stirred into a frenzy
For the last hour, I have been waking
Recovering from a lengthy surgery
(They) put a detective
Somewhere inside me
Now I’m a monster
What have they done to me
Now my blood burns with paranoia
There’s always breaking twigs
All around me
I twitch at every single sound
=2(Your flailing arms
Took down a power line
So now we live
With nasty battery lights)
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7. |
Comeback Kid
03:49
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Why do I keep staggering back to my feet
For one more round
Inviting you to put me down
I know my friends
Are sick of absorbing my ends
I see myself
As something that cannot be helped
There’s only so many times
You can climb out of a hole
So many times
You can climb out of a hole
I’ve seen what I wanted to see
And when I try
It gets scattered into impotent breeze
And when I try
It’s just mist against burning trees
I know you lie
A censor upon my beliefs
I know you lie
Reality’s hidden from me
Now it’s all sinking in
It’s becoming real
It’s all sinking in
The ending is near
Feels so close now
I could just reach out
I’ve seen what I needed to see
I’ve seen what I needed to see
Reality’s hidden from me
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8. |
Survival Tricks
03:28
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=2(All your things can be rebuilt)
Time will not return my health to me
Time will not return my…
Broken down month by month
Used every survival trick I know
A day is too much, too much, too much
Even five minutes feels slow
=2(All your things can be rebuilt
All your things can be rebuilt
Time will not return my health to me
Time will not return my health)
Carry my body, heavy as lead
Thrown about by the ocean swell
While I was breathless in my bed
You were on the phone to someone else
=2(All your things can be rebuilt)
Time will not return my health to me
Time will not return my health
All…
Living out on the oil rig
Where there’s nothing much to do
With all that time alone to think
All that time waiting for you
=2(All your things can be rebuilt
All your things can be rebuilt
Time will not return my health to me
Time will not return my health)
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9. |
Hey Kitty!
03:57
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After the riots, everything is still
The media crews left us to rebuild
Now everything’s quiet
There’s time to kill
The epilogue is a vast space to fill
Everyone keeps using this phrase:
“When it’s all over…”
Everyone keeps talking about
Getting back to normal
Everyone keeps telling me
What I shouldn’t be afraid of
Everyone seems sick of not
Getting everything they want
Well there will come a time
Somewhere in your life
When a doctor says
This is how it is now
This is how it is
This is how it is now
Well no-one really gets what they deserve
Some people think I should be angrier
And others say you have to let it go
I just want to feel like myself again
Everyone keeps acting like
A cat refusing medicine
Everyone keeps sharing
Their own reasons why they’re different
Everyone says they’ll change
But the timing’s not convenient
Everyone is boring
With the hills they choose to die upon
Everyone’s doing mental gymnastics
To exclude themselves
Everyone keeps telling me why
What they did was fine
Well there will come a time
Somewhere in your life
When a doctor says
This is how it is now
This is how it is
This is how it is now
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10. |
Healthy Fear
04:57
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Alex Manchester, UK
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